2011年5月25日 星期三
Expressing a opinion-I
Every year, thousands of animals are used to laboratory experiments. Because of some insignificant reasons, they are killed. Although many people take for granted to use animals to experiments, I strongly think that we don’t have the right to kill them. First of all, it is too cruel. Animals have feelings. Some cosmetics which use to keep beautiful are made from animals bitter.Secondly, if we use too much animals to experiments, we will destroy the ecosystem.Natural enemies disappear; animals which are suppressed by experimental animals will have a impact on our life.Last but not least, animals are different from humans in many places. The effects on animals are good, but the effects may have a bad influence on humans. It is for all the above-mentioned reasons that I believe we cant use animals in laboratory experiments.
訂閱：
張貼留言 (Atom)
Some cosmetics which use to keep beautiful are made from animals bitter.
回覆刪除這邊的bitter是...?
animals which are suppressed by experimental animals will have a impact on our life.
感覺by後面加個those指定那些被實驗的動物會比較明確一點
animals are different from humans in many places.
這邊用place應該不對吧??
The effects on animals are good, but the effects may have a bad influence on humans.
不懂這邊要表達的?
1.Every year, thousands of animals are used to laboratory experiments.
回覆刪除→Every year, thousands of animals are used in laboratory experiments.(我覺得這樣比較好耶…)
2.Although many people take for granted to use animals to experiments, I strongly think that we don’t have the right to kill them.
→Although many people take it for granted to use animals in experiments, I strongly think that we don’t have the right to kill them.
3.Some cosmetics which use to keep beautiful are made from animals bitter.
→Some cosmetics used to keep people beautiful are made from the bitterness of animal.
(看了超久才猜出妳的意思…不過妳的意思是「一些使人保持美麗的化妝品，是用動物的痛苦製作而成的。」嘛？)
4.Secondly, if we use too much animals to experiments, we will destroy the ecosystem.
→Secondly, if we use too much animals in experiments, we will destroy the ecosystem.
5.Last but not least, animals are different from humans in many places.
→Last but not least, animals are different from humans in many ways.
(想這麼改，不過如果意思改變了那就算了吧…)
6.The effects on animals are good, but the effects may have a bad influence on humans.
→我懂妳意思，可是這麼寫不太好…我不想動腦筋改了ˊˋ
(以上，淺見…)
Although many people take "it" for granted to use animals to experiments,
回覆刪除Some cosmetics which use to keep beautiful are made from animals bitter
小的才疏學淺，看不懂這一句要表達什麼
不好意思
too much animals
animal可數
much不可數
Natural enemies disappear; animals which are suppressed by experimental animals will have a impact on our life.
此句缺少連接詞
have a bad influence on humans.
influence可數嗎??
Some cosmetics which use to keep beautiful are made from animals bitter.
回覆刪除↑這句是....???
The effects on animals are good, but the effects may have a bad influence on humans.
↑這句的意思是"用在動物身上反應良好的,不代表用在人身上就好"這樣嗎
其他應該沒了吧...(?)
Although many people take for granted to use animals to experiments,
回覆刪除to後面要加動詞吧
改成in比較好噢:D
Some cosmetics which use to keep beautiful are made from animals bitter.
use要加s哦
Every year, thousands of animals "are used to" laboratory experiments.
回覆刪除是are used in
are made from animals "bitter"
它的意思是?
we "cant" use animals
少一撇
主題句+第二論點的＂to＂要改成＂in＂。
回覆刪除Some cosmetics which use to keep beautiful are made from animals bitter.我想這樣寫：
＂Some cosmetics which are used to keep people
beautiful are made by pain of others.＂
...animals which are ...will have a impact on...
＂a＂→＂an＂。
The effects on animals are good, but the effects may have a bad influence on humans.這句不怎麼會改：
＂Something is good for animals may has a bad influence on humans.＂
末句＂cant＂錯字。
果然是雷多……
如有誤，請不吝嗇指教。